End of fall dreaming

End of fall Dreaming


So i open my eyes ever so slowly
i open to see a fish eye view of the sky
purple with white slowly ombre to that beautiful blue i know well
the clouds are still, frozen from motion
the sun smiling at me

As my eyes clear i see things that greet me, kindly.
trees, taller than i ever remember, being my canopy.
but not in an intrusive way,
letting enough light and space in that i can still see the beauty of the sky.

it is afternoon and the trees continue growing, and I'm watching them age
their bark change color
a beautiful peeling white
their leaves have gone from bight green to my favorite color scheme
warm mahoganies and Carmel's
mocha's and pumpkins and gingerbreads
and they begin to fall so slowly
i hear them and close my eyes to listen,
to hear each individual special piece of the tree take its turn
to hear each ones personality
and I think  thank me
soon its a storm
and I'm swimming in piles of leaves and they wont stop falling
they cover my lap my hair my skin my eyes
i am one with the leaves

but soon I'm laughing.
my heart is light
I'm laughing so uncontrollably
but i realize I'm not the only voice
there is a warmth, another human
i look across the field, and its you. laughing with me
but you aren't across the field anymore
you're with me
laughing
we lay there and stare up at the sky

i open my head and show you some thing
Its a purple flower
fusha with purple and black seals
its fluid like water colors
and it spins like an umbrella
so we trace it
with our fingers we point
with our palms we move the color to and from
it sour own creation
untill the watercolor washes away and leaves us

I look ahead
but its only darkness
i see nothing
i know of nothing
but you take my hand and we walk that direction
its long walk but a nice one
and when we get there the sun has set
just after dusk
and you take me by the hand and run
you run so fast i have to skip
i skip to keep up with you
some inspiration pushes both of us and we are miles away
miles upond miles and miles

its so light out
in the dark of night our faces are illuminated
as if the flame inside our hearts lights us
I look up and realize
its the stars
so we find a spot in the field and gaze
we galaxy gaze because its not just stars out anymore
we watch the milky way move
much like the flower did
around us colorful and bright
the wind passes by our ears
and only sweet music plays.

That was my dream today.

Revision

A revision of Original Blog Post

 This summer I travelled around Europe studying works of art with Mrs. Reitz, the world history teacher. Recently I began piecing together my portfolio for showcase and i ran across this image from the summer trip. This was a simple snap shot I took and didn't look back on, but when I ran across it a second time it made me think.  There is something so sweet and innocent about the little girl on her mothers back. I began dwelling on the unconditional love of parents. I know that my parents love me no matter what I do, and often i credit this to the fact that they created me. I began exploring this principle of love through creation in Merry Shelly's Frankenstein. 

So a creation is by definition "the act of producing or causing to exist; the act of creating; engendering." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creation  Of course my parents love me because they have watched me grow, but the fact that I am their creation increases those feelings and bond. So this makes me wonder why in Frankenstein is the monster not loved? Victor did create him and spend all this time and effort on him. Was it simply because he was ugly? So do appearances really matter so much as to cancel out that natural tendency of unconditional love? Obviously that love would no longer be considered unconditional. 

Granted this is not exactly a parent child relationship, monster and creator... but what could be any closer? The monster was created by Victor and you'd assume that some kind of platonic love of some kind would be present. The only time that Victor shows any parental instinct is when he takes responsibility and decides create a companion monster. This second creation is Victors attempt to fix his own problems, the monster in question. With that in mind no longer is the companion monster a sign of love and caring but rather Victors attempt at redemption. Victor is like a bad parent with selfish and  A really negligent parent. 

College Essay Numero UNO

The prompt of this college essay was:
"Tell us about your passion for the theater, how you came to the theater, your training, and why CCM is the program for you...."

 

I sit consumed in silence listening intently in the dark corner that resembles a closet. I stare thirty feet below at the ghost like moving figures. I watch the stage waiting to call the next cue and see the magic of the theater unfold.  With each cue called, light hung, and line said and alternate reality is created and it is one of passion, romance, and surprises. The theater is powerful in its raw reactions from the audience fuelling the creation of a beautiful piece of art, night after night. All around the world, for centuries, the theater has had audiences, techies, and actors filled with a new kind of light, inspiring the innovative world that is the theater

.

In 2007 I was accepted into Booker T. Washington High School for the Performing and Visual Arts. I entered as a drama acting major in hopes to expand my abilities as an actress. During my freshman year my teacher preached the concept of being a well-rounded artist. Without experience in every aspect of the theater I cannot truly be the artist I wished to be. With this in mind I took Set Construction, Stage Management, Lighting Design, Sound Design, and all of my acting classes. This exposure grew my passion for theater and I began to care less about if I was acting on the stage and more about being part of a processes.  I had to be part of the theater, no matter what I was doing. During my sophomore summer I managed two shows outside of school and decided that I had found my niche. Stage Management included every part of theater that I had come to love. To this day my passion for stage management in the theater continues to grow, as does my need for a challenge.

I hope to be challenged and pushed as an artist at CCM. I am looking for a program that is fast paced, challenging, and full of new problems to solve. I believe that CCM will give me just that. I am a very passionate and focused individual hoping to apply my time fully to the art I love so much. When I graduate I hope to be a working Stage Manager. I am very opened minded to Opera, Musical Theater, and drama, as all of them are equally as exciting! I’d like to be doing this full time until I retire. After being the stage management intern at the Dallas Theater Center I have been exposed and a part of a professional working theater and there is no place I’d rather be. I hope to spend all my days in a theater, and my only days off to be Mondays! CCM will give me the tools and experiences of all forms of theater and a rigorous program to keep me engaged!  This will fully equip me to be a working professional in the wonderful world that is the theater. I am excited and looking forward to spending all my days learning to creating new magic for audiences!

 

Now Slip Under

This creative post is a poem loosely based off of "Now Goes Under" by Edna St. Vincent Millay

Now I slip under, and I watch it grow, that love
that entrances and engulfs.
Today has ended the struggle, in your clutching fists,
and the senseless quarrels,
Of friendship magnified, and frightening
That leads to an angry ocean.

This is truth
That I should have gone
From that consuming love, that constant hungry mouth
so ready to dine with fork and knife
to leave so many deteriorating. Face to Chest
weakening backbone in this place,
where honesty is a delicacy,
and sincerity comes only three times a day,
I am drowning, swallowed by the motions.

I would have swam, but if I could
The waves would grow taller, the salt burn,
the storm going further than the eye can see
But only for me, the weak one.

Now goes the will, I slip under.
Farewell, sweet self, you are eaten.

Parents love

  This summer I travelled around Europe studying works of art with Mrs. Reitz. Recently I began piecing together my portfolio for showcase and i ran across this image. This was a simple snap shot I took and didn't look back on but when I ran across it a second time it made me think.  There is something so sweet and Innocent about the little girl on her mother back. I began dwelling on the unconditional love of parents. I know that my parents love me no matter what I do, and often i credit this to the fact that they created me. 

So a creation is by definition "the act of producing or causing to exist; the act of creating; engendering." Of course my parents love me because they have watched me grow, but the fact that I am their creation increases those feelings and bond. So this makes me wonder why in Frankenstein is the monster not loved? Victor did create him and spend all this time and effort on him. Was it simply because he was ugly? So do appearances really matter so much as to cancel out that natural tendency of unconditional love? Obviously that love would no longer be considered unconditional. 

Granted this is not exactly a parent child relationship, monster and creator... but what could be any closer? The monster was created by Victor and you'd assume that some kind of platonic love of some kind would be present. The only time that Victor shows any parental instinct is when he takes responsibility and decides create a companion. Although that is a failure, Victor is like a bad parent. A really negligent parent. 

Does a rant letter count as creative?

Dear Shakespeare,

You were my first exposure to the theater, and i thank you for that. Taming of the shrew kindled a flame that honest can not be stomped out. The theater to me has become more than just a place of romance, creativity, and passion but has become home as well. I do credit you with original inspiration... but here recently i have had a bone to pick with you. WHY must you be so based? Yes I know Sparknotes says you have some deep internal meaning behind every word, but I beg to differ. You were an actor. So you know what that means? you wanted all of three things 1.Lots of lines to say that make you sound real nice 2.Drama drama drama, something crazy has to happen 3. To eat, and thus to make money. You wrote to make money, and I wont be convinced otherwise.
After spending 2 summers studying your works, and reading over 8 of your plays I have come to the conclusion you aren't very creative. Its always the same story, same drama, same solution. And those supposed "tragedies" such as king Lear, don't worry about a resolution, lets just kill EVERYONE! As I continue reading your works I am honestly disappointed. Hamlet was short lived, rather unmoving. King Lear was just depressing, why would I WANT to read or see that? Your comedies are nice and entertaining until you have seen a few of them and then can guess the outcome of ALL of them.
But here is the real kicker Shakespeare, did you even write these? You know there isn't a single official document saying that you were an actor or a writer. It is also hard to understand how without a decent education you wrote so eloquently...you are looking a tad bit sketchy.
All of the previous aside, you were an interesting trend setter. Words like vomit, bubble, freezing, half-blooded, and phrases such as "as good luck would have it" were all started by you, and are still going! Jk Rowling has made a killing off your word "half-blooded!"Despite how suspicious I am of your genuine authenticity of all that is theater, I do respect you. Your plays apply to all walks of life and inspire so many, including me. I was once that little girl who would beg, scream, and cry until my parents took me to Shakespeare in the park. I once saw Taming of the shrew 4 times in one season, just three years ago I saw the Merry Wives of Windsor three times. Shakespeare your plays have the ability to engage an audience of all ages, cultures, and experiences. Hats off to you!

Write you soon,
Renata D.

Waiting on Superman, is his name Mike Miles?

Recently I watched a documentary titled "Waiting on Superman." This documentary begins by addressing the major pitfalls of the public education system in hopes to suggest the changes that should be made. The film caught my attention originally due to statistics on average high school drop out rates in Washington DC. In one inner city high school over 50 percent of student drop out before graduation. A woman named Michelle Rhee, known for being a business woman, was appointed as the superintendent of the district and began enforcing serious reforms. The documentary takes us through all the positive changes and controversial strategies she used to turn her district in a positive direction. The documentary then show a failing school district in New York where children wait amongst hundreds of others to be admitted into a charter school.
I was absolutely crushed as I watched second and third grades cry over their "lack of a future" if they were not admitted. They introduce us to 6 different kids who had a hope for higher education to peruse their dreams but many were denied this. By the end of the documentary I was infuriated. How can the kids futures be based on a raffle? (this is how they are admitted to charter schools) Why is it that their public schools could not offer them the same opportunities? And are we institutionalizing poverty?
This really got me thinking and I felt it was absolutely necessary to learn more. I began reading "the Death and Life of The American School System,"at the moment I have only finished the first chapter, but I plan on continuing blogging about it. The first chapter, much like the introduction of the documentary, gives you statics and facts catching the readers immediate attention. It also addresses the fact that superintendents have a lot of power of the success of the district.
This hit home, just this year DISD has received a new superintended. This hardly goes unnoticed as policies in the class room have changed. All the doors must remain open, all the lights must be on, we must respond with thumbs up, down, or sideways, all teachers must stand outside their door... its these things that change a class room dynamic. So as a student I question, is Mike Miles pulling a Michelle Rhee? Will all of these curriculum and policy changes help the schools progress? In Booker T. maybe not, as we a fairly wealthy and successful school, but what is this doing to other DISD schools? At the moment all I see changing is the level of noise in the hallways, or maybe the number of rules we are breaking.
Personally I do believe the harder you push student, curriculum wise, the more they learn. Push me! Challenge me! But this doesn't mean treat me like a third grader, THUMBS UP! None the less as I continue reading and observing the dramatic changes in DISD I will report back to this blog and update you! until then
- Renata D.