Not in High School Anymore

No I'm not.
Maybe Mr. Lindsey required us to make this blog for a reason.
My reason?
 I need a place to rant.
Why do I need a place to rant?
No one wants to really talk about things. Problems are ether too big or too small for everyone to care about... since when did size decide what is important?

Today was full of important things I saw that upset me. Lets go through my day:

2. My generation. the people around me. There is a  lack of understanding. Do people not understand that every choice they make is a reflection. That racist, shallow minded, ignorant music they listen to? It says something. nothing is JUST something. Music is not just music. its a reflection of us. what we believe, promote and support. Im not saying lets all be good ol country boys, but if I hear about another "pussy" to a beat .... I might lose it.

3. Im alone on this. Maybe not completely alone but I personally dont know anyone who agrees with me. Why is it that no one sees what we subject and stamp to our generation. Sex drinking and drugs. Do we value things of this kind? I thought the older we got we would begin to value individuality, new ideas, the simplicity and beauty in things. I thought very wrong. I can not bring myself to level with the present popular mentality.  I am not sexy because I've had sex. Im sexy because I have a brain and I use it. Im not fun because I party till I blackout. I'm fun because I enjoy people and their company. And Im not creative due to some "crazy enlightening trip mayne."  Im creative due to my passionate belief in art and how it can teach. 

4.  I thought college was supposed to be this big wide world of other students who wanted to learn just like me. Instead I find more ignorant, status quo abiding citizens. And thats fine. not for me. But if it works for the guy next door, what can I do?

A students view on DISD reform

In the mornings I drag myself out of bed and attempt to enjoy the monotony of my senior year. I have seen my 12th grade year as a shinning beckon, the year of not only new found adult hood but a time d for fun. Before my fall semester I hopes that my senior year would be full of joyful memories of friends and fun activities, and senior pride. On the contrary my memories of booker t have been far from enjoyable. Classed have started and not ceased to be a place of torture, not due to my senoritas. My misery has simply come from my lack of learning.My first 3 years at booker t were full of fun moments of creative learning through my eccentric and brilliant teachers. We shared moments of discovery that i felt representing the wonderful message of an arts high school, but my senior year has not had this impact.

Since day once we have seen gradual changes, nothing too dramatic with doors remaining open, lights on, no video, and lots of thumbs in the air. All of these changes the student body laughed at, but accepted knowing maybe at some inner city school, it was useful.

Second semester has come and passed and I am dismayed and disgusted by the LACK of learning in all of my classes. No longer are any lesson plans accessing my creativity. Ive learned how to copy a text book with all the work sheets I have been give, and the amount of note cards I have wasted could build a tree. With very structured and mandated lesson plans not only have my teachers been belittled in their ability to teach but my intelligence has been belittled. My thumbs simply DO NOT express my level of understanding in the class room. As the ra ing boy in duncanville said if you want me to learn ENGAGE me.

But it is too late. I write this blog post dreading for my sister, only a freshman, her next three years. I even suggested that she might want to return to our home school, Plano Senior. MY junior year I swore up and down to dozens of tour that there was not a better school on the planet. Booker t was engaging, artistic, and gave me a new love for people. I no longer believe this. My senior year has been hardly enlightening and my greatest memory will be the stressed out teachers,emotionally stressed; not teaching me because they are simply too concerned with evaluations.

What is my generation?!

 

SPRING BREAK BETCHES

and so not sorry for this blog post

 

 

 

 

Have these images interested you yet? are you appalled? If not by the end of the blog... you will be.

 

For those of you who have not seen this movie STOP reading this blog, I will ruin it for you. OR maybe keep reading so you dont waste your 10$ as my boy friend did on me.

 

Lets begin with I saw this movie in a playful mood. I thought it would be funny to see 1.A stupid teenage parody on spring break 2.It was well advertised! 3. I love James Franco and him emulating RIFF RAFF could be the best celebrity stunt of the year. So I assumed this is my kind of movie. You know what assuming does... ASSES, you and me both.

The first 3o minutes of this movie was hysterical, granted in an absurd "I cant believe they are doing that stuff" kind of way. The movie opens with tits montage, spring break parties, drugs, bored teenage girls, oh AND TITS. DID I MENTION TITS?!

What happens in this movie? Let me timeline it for you

 

 

First 30 min: Girls rob a store, they feel like "bad bitches" and leave for spring break.

 

Next 30 min: Girls party really hard, decide that this place is "Magical and life changing" Selina Gomez is bringing her Grandma in the sequel! And then they get arrested for snorting cocaine off some lady, classy. (add in some sacrilegious prayers while imprisoned)

 

Next 30 min: James Franco bails the girls out of jail. Everyhting he says references to a terrible sex square, or something of the kind. The "good Christan girl" goes home cause JAMES FRANCO IS GOING TO RAPE HER. I would leave too.

 

Last 30 minutes: Sex Montages. Drug Montages. James Franco has sex with a gun?

 

ENDING: The girls kill everyone. ( when writers look for a resolution in a story they joke "lets just kill everyone." THEY ARE KIDDING PEOPLE, KIDDING. That is simply not a resolution.

 

So many kids in my class would ask me "Whats wrong with that?" Let me tell you whats wrong with this movie, if you haven't caught on. Millions of dollars have been spent and funneled into producing and selling this sad sad piece of "art" HA. This movie appealed to one crowd, my generation. Everything about this movie screamed college and high school students around the USA  lets idolize everything that is wrong with society. Lets glamorize doing drugs and get put in jail, because DONT WORRY some nasty guy will bail you out if you have lots of sex with him. I am sad to say it made 12,616,764 $$ opening week in the US alone, can you hear me weeping?

 

I have been told I am taking this movie too seriously, and that might be so. I was told to do some research on the director, produce, and "art" of the film. SO I DID. what did I find?

1. This director just wanted the money, he had no purpose at all but the "see one of my films on the big screen."

2. Same goes for the producer

3. The only art I can find in the film is the location. The beach was beautiful, the light of the movie was VERY well done. A++ for the visual aspect but all the Tits and cocaine kind of distracted me from seeing this the first go around.

 

 

 

Critics have called this "Scarface meets Britney Spears" but the only quote that stuck with me was "This money makes my pussy wet."To say the least I think this movie has added nothing to society. I could have gone without this movie and been perfectly happy. Social commentary or not I will not be seeing another movie like this. Sorry Richard you are never picking the movie we see again.

 

 

 

 

 

NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND

**** none of this blog post should be taken seriously, the following comments reflect the thoughts of a hormonal teenager, please excuse the following****

This activity based on the Handmaids tale immediately appealed to me as the door read "Loud activity." Once explained the game  that resembled my favorite game mafia, I was extremely excited to play. Unfortunately due to not being the most popular with my class mates I was killed the first partition round... So I'm extremely unsure what to write about. I was told I could write about
-Alliances
-Rules of the game
- a reflection of the game
- comparison of the game and the themes
but I'm not.
 Granted I am taking the change of not receiving credit for this blog but I'm JUST "DGAF, SKA, $pring Break"  enough to post a risky blog post.
So here is the truth about this game. This game was well thought out and just complicated enough that I'm not exactly sure how it worked. I was kicked out just soon enough that I never learned how it worked. I can say with all confidence that it was very amusing to kill me, and the class would agree. River, the initial instigator of my demise, later told me I was persecuted for sheer amusement. I respect this. Killing people for a grade in English sounds like a blast... but not at the expense of another persons grade. This is where I become.... spiteful. WHY ME?! Okay its really not that big of a deal, but initially you feel that burn, the pain, the automatic hatred for the peers that ripped your project grade away from you. So I move for reform! REFORM OF THE HANDMAID GAME SO THAT NO CHILD IS LEFT BEHIND, as I was.
I WARN others, this game is violent, unpredictable, and cruel. I hear in another class that Gabby was slapped repeatedly for misconduct! Not to mention by the end of the day over 20 seniors had been persecuted! Although the game is advertised as "good educational fun" it is clear that the game is more destructive than productive. It is my regret to inform future children of this English class that unless something changes you too will be persecuted.

Capture as I go

This is an essay I just finished for a "super power" scholarship.

Imagine the microscopic bugs crawling through grass, water colored pastel skies, the dew drops on petals in the morning. The Earth is a beautiful place full of creations that astonishes the human mind. Unfortunately we are unable to keep these images and moments forever.  We admire the beautiful world around us and the creatures that thrive by capturing precious moments with our camera, often in hopes to keep the beautiful moments for our generation and many to come.  If I were to choose a superpower it would be more of ability. I would replace my eyes with cameras. Every precious moment, microscopic image would be captured with my telephoto and macro focused eyes.

I often find myself seeing images in my everyday routine that I would like to keep and cherish as part of my day. This is the reason I keep my camera on me but even being well skilled in photography does not capture exactly what I am seeing.  With my eyes being cameras I could capture exactly what I see down to the exposure, aperture, and angel.  I would begin every morning by capturing a picture of the moon still sitting alongside the rising sun. As I continued my day through the halls of an arts school I would capture an array of images from dancers flowing together in rhythm, artists painting with thick acrylics, to the musicians plucking away at vibrating strings. In the afternoon, the fuchsia sky on fire with the sunset of everyday would no longer appear as a washed out cheesy image. 

This ability to capture exactly what I see would be revolutionary in the way I remember things. No longer would memories be susceptible to the minds manipulation but would be archived in the thousands of photos my mind put away. I could capture moment’s creativity such as an artist doodling in their sketchbook. I could capture the precious moment as a baby bird hatches from its speckled egg.  I could keep the moments of true love as family members greet loved ones at the airport. All of the moments we often take for granted would be captured in their perfection to be remembered later.

With my superpower I would hope to show others the beauty in the world. Often Society has us moving so fast that we do not appreciate or understand where we wake up every day. If I could share all the wonderful images I see then hopefully those around me could appreciate the Earth and community around them. Once someone experiences true spontaneity in creativity or the birth of a living creature, how can they not love the world that surrounds them?  If all societies on Earth could agree on the need to stop and appreciate world’s beauty we could great a loving society.

Slithery Lamb

Lamb Serpent

After much deliberation and English class i found that  i am a lamb serpent. First and foremost the image that comes to mind for a "lamb serpent" is far from how I would like to envision myself. I searched the web for a "lamb serpent" a "slithery lamb," "snake lamb," and hybrid snake lamb." Not much to my surprise this is what it came up with.

So not exactly what I was going for... I feel as if this image is symbolizing Adam and Eve.... so disregard the over all meaning of the image.  But it is as close to as a "lamb serpent, slithery lamb, snake lamb, hybrid snake lamb" we can get.
 I never personally saw myself as a lamb, due to my less than shy personality; or a serpent, due to my overall care for other people. Lets make some sense of this diagnosis.
LAMB: I am less likely to kill, or harm another human. I am too much of a coward to ever hurt another human. Other than being a coward I question what right I have to hurt another person. In class the situation was brought up "well what if they killed someone" or "what if they were coming after you?" Honestly I still would not be able to hurt another human, or animal for that matter. As other kids in class obviously disagreed I could only come to one conclusion, I feel this way due to life experiences. In no way would I ever want blood on my hands, I simply see human life as too precious. This includes the man on death row, or the angry person coming after me. I am only a human just like everyone else, I am simply equal. I have no authority, power, or the guts to take the life from someone, and I often feel if that meant giving my life, I would. It seems very dramatic, yes. But growing up I have watched my parents give everything to people they love, and as I become older I begin to understand. I understand that one day i might give my everything to someone else whether that be my husband, child, or someone i don't know, I believe that is how humans should treat each other. Feel free to disagree.

SERPENT: This is a tricky one. I am more likely to lie. Although I despise lying and believe it is horrible I also know it is sometimes very necessary. I would never lie to harm another person. I would never lie simply for my benefit and computability. I'd like to be able to say I only lie when it is better for a situation. Example, growing up my father was, and still is, very sick. My little sister never understood why she couldn't see dad some weekends, or rough house with him like she used to. We would tell her dad was just tired and needed to sleep.Explaining to a 6 year old that your father is slowly deteriorating from multiple sclerosis is not a good idea. That is an extreme example but perfectly fit. Lies are just necessary and those who say they don't lie.... are simply lying. We ALL lie. regularly and often they are so minuscule and insignificant that we forgot we ever lied. I own up to this, after all I am a teenager. So when being a liar or a "serpent" there is a very fine line between being normal and being a bad person. When confronted about lying, own up to it! I believe that is the fine line.


As whole I found this English exercise to be very interesting, but also showed how I think many of us still are learning who we are. We all feel like adults but I think the truth is im only 18 and im still figuring out what I would and wouldn't do. All of this could change as I will in the  years to come. But for now I am a Serpent Lamb.

Equal Power

In the handmaid’s tale chapter 13-16 we watch as Janie confesses how she was gang raped. To my surprise the women told her it was her fault and proceed to call her a cry baby. This is not what I expected out of these women at all.

For some reason I thought the women might pity her or at least identify with being raped, as the society has institutionalized rape as a whole. The women should identify with her as their society has subjected them to only the cruelty of sex rather than making it an object of love and affection. At a point in chapter 16th making love is referred very mechanically as "fucking."

Contrary to what I thought these women had no sense of community and readily turned against each other. Instead these women saw the men as faultless, clearly demonstrating the power of men in the society. Janie herself returns to admit the rape is her fault rather than the men. It baffles me as to why these women are so cruel to each other and have the survival of the fittest mentality. It is evident that these women would throw each other under the buss due to the mentality of "better you than me."

As appalled as I was by the treatment of women against other women I could not help but begin to see the similarities between their society and my own. In high school so often i see young girls loose friends and treat each other poorly, and sometimes it is due to the influence of a boy. Women are ready to turn on each other in present day society just as they would in a dystopia. Often this betrayal is simply to get ahead or to not be patronized. I see this same interact amongst grown women, as the "petty high school gossip" is never left in high school. But what causes this?

In the Handmaid’s tale this lack of regard for each other is obviously created by the men who run the society. Everything is centered on pleasing the man and bearing children for them, the women themselves have no identity other than "handmaid" or "wife." It is possible that this lack of identity debilitates the women from ever forming a true community. Also due to all the power being in the hands of men the women could feel pressured and obligated to form an alliance to the men rather than the other women.

Although less extreme often I observe that men hold the power in society as well. Often men are CEOs, principles, and president, obvious sources of power and I began to wonder what power men have over my life. In advertisement I see what a woman is supposed to appear to be. The materialistic choices I make daily such as what I wear and how I present myself have all been shaped by what I’ve been told men want. So much of my life has been shaped around what advertisers show as desirable, because every woman wants to be desired. So how can I change this?

The truth is I can’t do anything other than place my priorities elsewhere. Rather than focusing on materialistic values of being desirable I focus on relationships. This includes my relationship with not only men but women as well. An equal value should be placed on what women and men think. When it comes down to it I’m running in the circle of equality that women have been dealing with for years and the only change I can make is one in myself.